Last I did this, I felt I was being a bit too nice with the Nostalgia Critic episodes. While I do like those episodes, they do have their faults. Ergo, while these Foamy rants are some of Jonathan Ian Mathers's best work, they aren't without fault.
Before we get started, there are some ground rules to cover:
1) These rants are in no particular order.
2) What you are about to see contains harsh language, mild/partial nudity and sexually suggestive themes; therefore, these shorts are rated NSFW and viewer discretion is advised.
3) I am not an animation expert or an art student, so do not expect an expert analysis on the quality of the art; however, if I see something really cool or crappy, I'll let you know.
Without any further ado, let's begin:
A great short from six years ago about the issue of smoking and quitting smoking from the perspective of the non-smoker. It is very harsh and somewhat ignorant of what it's like to be addicted to something as powerful as tobacco, but then, Foamy really doesn't care. That's not what the short is about; it's about what non-smokers have to go through when dealing with family, friends and co-workers who make life hard on them because of their addiction struggles. A sample of the harsh reality check Foamy gives to his watchers.
This one isn't quite as hate-filled, but also not nearly as focused. The object of the video was to talk about the disappearance of fat people in the media; what it becomes is a rant on people opting for tummy tucks and fat scrapes as a cop out to traditional dieting and exercise. There are two other Foamy rants that take on the Atkins diet which cover the same amount of ground as this rant and may be slightly funnier, but also more juvenile. A good rant all around, even if the initial topic was all but abandoned after the first 90 seconds.
The years 2006 - 2009 were great years for Foamy rants, and this ranks up there with the best. A rant on some of the more annoying aspects of TV viewing, namely ads for all sorts of drugs & body enhancements, plus pop ads interrupting our favorite shows. While the drug commercials part of the rant is still timely, the pop ads are not as pervasive as they were six years ago, so the rant is a bit dated in that regard. Still, it works AND it might get a laugh or two out of you.
Right in the heart of the McCain-Obama presidential campaign season comes this harsh, unfocused, but still watchable gem. What starts out as a rant about how politicians don't care about us (and they don't liberals and conservatives), turns into a rant about the quality of today's education and the public school system. It does come back around at the end, but what starts out as a harsh, reality-based rant turns into a pseudo-conspiracy theory with a little logical merit, but oversimplified. Still, Foamy is quite snarky, and good snark will always save the day.
Much more lighthearted than previous rants on this list, this one about the dining experience almost comes off as a George Carlin-esque comic set, especially the whole bit about violently lashing out at servers who come to your table singing "Happy Birthday." Also, the bit at the end about subtracting money amounts from your bill based off negative aspects of your dining experience may be painful for servers, but for the customer, I DEMAND THIS BECOME LAW! There is a sequel to this rant, aptly named "Restaurants II," but it's not as good or as charming as the original.
Admittedly, this isn't a single rant and that these six or so episodes over the span of nine years aren't traditional rants in that Foamy is not speaking directly and exclusively to the audience. The ambiguously gay barista is to an extent a wall off which to bounce back and forth the various rant topics and jokes; otherwise known as a straight man, in comic terms (POP CULTURE REFERENCE AND IRONIC PUN COMBO). If you haven't guessed by the title and the visual cues just from the video next to this text, these are a series of rants about Starbucks and its conquering of the coffee house world. The first "Star-Schmucks" episode was a short entitled "Small, Medium, Large" in 2003, complaining about the renaming of the sizes to tall, grande & venti (not to mention the high prices and "sucky" under-taste). The last short in the series, the one shown here, entitled "Last Coffee House Stand" from 2011, is a rare example of Foamy ending his exhausting fight against Star-Schmucks with a few parting shots. A rare example in the "Neurotically Yours" series of a flowing narrative outside of the main storyline involving Foamy and Germain. A must see.
This short is a bit of an acquired taste - not because of the subject material or the advice, but because of the delivery. In the early days of Neurotically Yours, Foamy the Squirrel talked a lot faster than he does these days. This was to give the impression that he was hyper, a touch insane, but at the same time, a speaker of truth and logic. If the high-pitch voice that sounds like Simon from "Alvin & The Chipmunks" got kicked in the acorns doesn't bother you, listening to it at a fast speed might turn you off. If you're still interested, this is another funny look at real life with some truth and real advice mixed in.
While other Foamy rants have some form of comedy, harsh truth or unfocused delivery that tends to damage the message (sometimes intentionally), this short is spot on. Anyone who spends a lot of time on news websites and YouTube will know that every gripe and every point in this rant is spot on. Internet forums and message boards have become festering sewers of intolerance and hatred - proof that we can't have nice things. Preach on animated squirrel, preach on.
For every gamer ever, this is gospel. At some point in our lives, we've had to deal with the game store (by now, Gamestop, since all other alternatives are either owned or have been driven out of business by Gamestop) and their rip-off game-buying policies. Buy a game at full price, return it as soon as the next day, and all of a sudden you're only getting back a third (AT BEST) of what you originally paid. I'm not going to deviate in to the topic since Foamy already covered it all, but needless to say, the squirrel gets it right. A must see.
If there ever was a clear case to be made for same-sex marriage - this is it. There is a lot of good cases made here about same-sex marriage, and the harsh, almost combative way Foamy sets to task in this one gives the argument conviction. I'm not here to advocate for one point of view or another - if you're for same-sex marriage, you'll love this short; if you're for traditional marriage, you will hate it, BUT you will find some points that will be hard to argue, such as the percentage of people not getting marriage and the percentage getting divorced - if marriage is so sacred, how come it's becoming less popular with straight folks every generation? Just something to think about, and the animated angry squirrel gives you plenty to ponder in this rant.
Yeah, while I have not now or have ever owned a PlayStation 3 or XBox 360, I am well-aware of the pointlessness that are achievements and achievement farming. Achievements are indeed the utter garbage of today's gaming - digital awards and accolades that don't really exist and are only there to make you feel special when you're anything but. The whole conspiracy theory at the end takes away the seriousness of the message, but that's fine since the topic wasn't anything serious to begin with. The added bit with the funny achievement pop-ups weaves the laughs through the monologue.
If I had a guess, I'd say that the majority of people who read my commentary and watch these shorts tend to skew liberal and may or may not be in favor of legalizing marijuana. I should qualify this short by calling it a bit dated, around eight years old, and given today's more open view of legalizing pot as opposed to a mere few years ago. Having said that, this short is more about people and their inability these days to deal with real life and their emotions without the use of a controlled substance, both the illegal and legal kind. The message comes off harsh, but the point is still driven home - if we expect children to be drug-free and deal with real life, then parents have to set the example.
Well, I hope you enjoyed these shorts and if you want to see more, just check out Mathers's YouTube channel, jimathers, or his website, illwillpress.com. Because of the backlog of posts, I will try to update every day between now and Saturday, but I make no promises. Check back soon for a little side post as to what's happened the past two weeks or so and where we go from here.
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